from Touchstones
The struggle of the male to learn to listen to and respect his own intuitive, inner promptings is the greatest challenge of all. His... conditioning has been so powerful that it has all but destroyed his ability to be self-aware. — Herb Goldberg
Men strive to be successful with mechanical, physical, and powerful things. Some of us have succeeded in those supposedly “male” ways, and others haven’t. But whether we have or not, most of us have poured our energies into those directions and neglected the other way of being strong men. We may not have learned how to be gentle and helpful fathers, sensitive lovers, or men in tune with our own spirits and feelings. Many of us never learned to recognize what we feel.
Perhaps we were taught to stand up for ourselves. But have we learned to stand up for our right to have feelings? Do we stand up for our right to be learners and to make mistakes? Do we stand up for our right to be aware and to be the men we find ourselves to be, rather than what others tell us we should be?
I will become more aware of my inner self as a growing man on this uncharted journey.
From Answers in the Heart
“Here” she said, “in this place, we flesh; flesh that weeps, laughs; flesh that dances on bare fleet in grass. Love it. Love it hard.” — Toni Morrison
Our body belongs to us, is a part of who we are. It is us, just as our intellect, spirit, and feelings are part of us. As sex addicts, we often have a love-hate relationship with our body. We often disconnect from our body — especially when we’re being sexual — in order not to feel pain. To disconnect from any part of ourselves hurts. Like walking on a sprained ankle, we compensate as best we can, but part of us is missing; part of us isn’t working the way it’s supposed to. And that part is our sense of ourselves as physical beings.
Recovery means reclaiming our body. We start from where we are and form a new relationship with ourselves. We can do it by changing our eating habits, exercising, improving our personal grooming, and going to the doctor. We patiently fill in the missing pieces of nurturing and attention. Then our sense of ourselves as whole people will include our newfound love of our body.
I have only one body. It was given to me not to misuse, but to love and care for.
Daily Meditation Books
Answers in the Heart - daily meditations for people recovering from sex addiction
Touchstones - daily meditations for recovering men
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