from Touchstones
Archie Bunker: What’s wrong with revenge? That’s a perfect way to get even. — Norman Lear
When we are locked within negative, hostile thinking patterns, we go around in mental circles. What seems perfectly rational to us at the time looks misguided and blind when we look back. Carrying a grudge or a desire to get even with someone is a cancer inside us. It belittles us and holds back our spirit.
We break through our mental circles by revealing our anger to others. We talk with other recovering men and let them know the details of our resentments. We listen to their experiences and apply them in our program. As long as we keep our thoughts and feelings to ourselves, we only recycle the same thinking system. When we take the risk and talk to friends, we build bridges that bring in new ideas.
I will not harbour my resentments within myself. I will talk with a trusted friend so I can learn to let them go.
From Answers in the Heart
What is moral is what you feel good after. — Ernest Hemingway
For so long, we defined feeling good by short-lived, sensual gratification. One of the consequences of sex addiction is the weakening or, worse, near destruction of our moral values. Taking inventory of our morals in recovery helps us on our way to becoming truly moral people once again.
We can decide what our personal morals are through experience, the program’s wisdom, and the guidance of a Higher Power. One of the greatest gifts of recovery is moral integrity, an inner and steadfast sense of what is right and wrong. If we do not have this, we will be forced to depend on things outside ourselves. If we espouse one thing publicly, but don’t really believe it, we will not live it, either. Our recovery depends on consistent values — especially values about sexuality — that lets us feel serene and good about ourselves. With the help of a searching and fearless inventory, we can live now according to our personal sense of morality and truly feel good again.
I will be open to the ideas of other people, but I will be guided by my own values.
Daily Meditation Books
Answers in the Heart - daily meditations for people recovering from sex addiction
Touchstones - daily meditations for recovering men
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